Busy getting ready still! Travel Notice issued!

Today, I went to the bank to get the cashiers check for the adoption, the post office to mail it, shopped for (a size bigger) pants(that took 3 hours!), took Connor to the store for new jeans for the trip, bought 3 weeks of dogfood, picked up Austin from school at 3p, took him to the chiropractor (he fell while skiing and is limping now), took the boys for haircuts, and then drove Connor to Tae Kwon Do at 6p. Whew! We also heard today that the final Travel Notice was issued yesterday, and we should have it in our hot little hands by Friday. Hooray! That was the very last paper we need to travel. Now if only Cheng will get better (he has a cold) all will be perfect. One week left and counting!!!

Paying today

I woke up at 4am this morning and couldn't get back to sleep. I kept running over my lists of things to do, so I decided I might as well get up and get my day started. Last night we received an email with our official itinerary and costs. The fees alone are enough to make a sane person lose a night's sleep. I honestly do not know how people afford to adopt multiple times. We've been corresponding regularly with a family that has adopted 10 children from China over the last few years, and I know another family who has adopted at least 8 children (they have 12 total!) from various countries. I honestly wonder, how do they manage all the fees? We are upper-middle class, and it's going to take us several years to pay off our credit card. The orphanage "donations" for our two boys total $11,255, payable by bank-certified check only, wired directly to China. I have to go get the check today, and Fedex it to Seattle, so that they can wire it to their representative in China (for $200 wiring fee). The only other option is to hand-carry that much money in cash. No thanks. I'm nervous enough traveling without carrying large amounts of cash. Then, of course, the trip itself will cost us well over $12,000, since there are 3 of us traveling to China, and five of us traveling for 2 weeks within China, and then five flights home. Add to that, the home-study fees, agency fees, notary fees, passports, original documents,Fedex charges, Chinese visas, passports, and immigration fees and the total is close to $10,000 more. If you're thinking, well, we could adopt a US child for less money, you would be mistaken. Adopting from the US is only slightly less expensive overall. The home-study, agency fees etc. are almost the same, no matter from where we adopt. The only big savings would be the cost of the trip, but we'd have to travel (usually a few trips) within the US too. Amazingly enough, we found out that tickets to states in the Midwest can cost as much as tickets to China. If we adopted in the US, we'd have to pay all the legal adoption fees here, which would be close to the cost of the orphanage donations. This is why many people choose to adopt abroad. In addition to USA adoptions not being much cheaper, the adoptions (of older children)in the USA are almost always "open" adoptions. This means that the parents, grandparents and other relatives know the names of the adopted parents, and often have visitation rights or the right to keep in touch. If they decline all their rights at adoption time, they can later go to court and petition for visitation rights. It happens all the time. The adopted children can also decide later that they want to see their biological family,and they can pursue that option at any time.I know someone who adopted a girl from the USA, and when the girl was a teen she found her biological mother. The biological mother then milked the girl out of her entire college fund. Yes, adopting from China isn't free, but we believe that it is worth every penny. I also try to remember that giving birth wasn't free either. Not only did I have a miserable nine months, but the costs of the hospital and doctor add up quickly too!!

Obsessing...or should I call it "nesting"?

I have been obsessing over our trip, as I always do before we travel. Today, I cleaned out the van. Why does the van need to be cleaned suddenly? Because when we arrive home from the airport, I don't want the boys' first impression to be a dirty car. Yes, I know, I go slightly overboard sometimes. I also put in the request to stop our mail, and I'm getting Austin's haircut tonight too. Before we leave, I'm determined that everyone gets their teeth cleaned (and the two children with braces also need to see the orthodontist), and I'm cleaning the house from top to bottom this weekend. The dogs are scheduled to go to the groomers the day before we leave. I don't want them stinking up their caretakers homes. I'm putting off my own hair appointment until the last minute, so that I look good for the trip. Oh yeah, and my nails need to be done last minute too. A manicure will not last more than 2 weeks, tops. Tomorrow, I'll find something else to fix, clean, schedule, or obsess about. Killing time wrecks havoc with my mental health!! Good thing I work-out everyday or I'd be an absolute mess!! I remember feeling this disjointed right before I had each of our children. The endless filling up of time. The two weeks before giving birth, when I no longer went into work each day, were shear torture. Hmmm. I'd better clean the garage tomorrow too.

Shopping almost done! Whoo HOO!

I am finally almost finished shopping for the trip to China. I had a consultation with our pediatrician on Wed., and bought all the prescriptions for the boys on Thursday. Today, I went to TJ Maxx and a new store in Geneseo to buy a few new clothes for the trip. I needed pants that didn't have metal zippers or buttons, and that was a whole day's worth of shopping. I really do NOT like shopping! I also bought a few new tops, and a bunch of travel size toiletries. I can't believe we're leaving in less than 2 weeks!! We've been waiting for so long, it is almost surreal. I just pray we get the travel notice for FengHong soon. I thought we'd have it by today, and I jump every time the phone rings, certain that it's WACAP with news of our travel. No such luck. We are going skiing tomorrow and Sunday, and that will make the weekend pass fast. Then we'll be on our FINAL week countdown. I still can't believe it's almost here!

FengHong is 59 inches tall! David's post

We got out the measuring tape last night and held it up to everyone to get a sense of what his height is. I am really looking forward to seeing Feng and Bing for the first time! Only about two weeks away now. We are also now considering John as a name for FengHong, instead of Jack. Cheng thought that John would sound more like Jiang, the last name that FengHong currently uses. Who knows, both boys may have other names they like, or they may want to keep their Chinese names...we'll see when they get here. (posted by David)

Updates on FengHong

We received an email last night with health updates for FengHong. Basically, it's just his recent height and weight. As usual, we had to sign the update and mail it back to WACAP ASAP. We found out that FengHong weighs 10 pounds more than Connor, and is 5 inches taller than Connor. So, he'll be in between the two boys in size, which is what we expected. I bought size 12 clothes, and I was right on target with my estimate. He'll wear a size 12S in jeans, just like Austin did last year. Things are moving forward. Yesterday, I booked the Ascott hotel online. It's expensive, over $200 a night, but from all that I've read it's best not to skimp on the accommodations. Several people wrote on their blogs that at their hotel the sheets were stained and dirty. Gross. At least a dozen writers addressed the filthy conditions in China. One person suggested bringing dozens of socks so that after walking in the room in stockinged feet, you could simply throw out the socks. I am really not willing to stay in a hotel that is that dirty. The hotel that I booked, The Ascott, is a five star hotel, it has a playroom for the kids, a (clean, I hope) pool, a Starbucks and Subway restaurants (as well as 3 other restaurants), and it's walking distance to Wal-Mart. Being able to purchase items easily ata Wal-Mart might prove invaluable! Today Connor and I are going to the bookstore to purchase a bunch of paperback books to bring on the trip. Usually, we get stacks of books at the library, but we want to be able to leave the books behind once we have read them. David compiled a list, Connor compiled a list, and I will just browse the shelves until I find a few interesting looking books for the trip. I already told Connor that he can begin reading to the boys on the very first day. Of course, they won't understand what is being read to them, but we want to establish the routine that we read every night before bed right from the start. One thing I learned by having exchange students and foster children, is to start off on the right foot by establishing routines from the first day. Never do something the first few days (such as let the children stay up late to watch TV), that you would not normally do or allow. It only makes for difficulties later.

Bon Voyage dinner--counting down!

Last night we had the family all over for a Bon Voyage dinner. Cheng cooked 4 or 5 different Chinese dishes (it took him hours!!), and I made a few American foods. My brother, Steven, said a wonderful prayer, blessing us as we go forward to China to bring home our sons. We showed the family the video of FengHong, and the most recent photos of BingHui, and everyone is anxiously awaiting their arrival in a few weeks. Even Marie (my step-mother) who was the least supportive about the idea of the adoptions, was upbeat and positive yesterday. Steven kept asking if, while we were in China, would we please bring home a son for him too! Mindy, his wife, is retiring from Xerox next month, at the age of 47, and I know Steven is praying and hoping that Mindy will decide to finally adopt a child. Steven has always wanted 6 children, and for some reason it just wasn't in God's plan for them. They have Lindsay, who is now 22, and I know Steven still hopes for a boy. Maybe our adoptions will have a positive impact on them.
On another note, our WACAP caseworker emailed me that our Travel Notice for FengHong should be issued soon. This is not really news, but at least she is keeping in touch with us regularly. Our inter-China reservations are going to be booked by a Chinese travel agency, except for the hotel in Beijing. I requested a hotel that the agency does not have a discount with, and the agency suggested I book the hotel myself. That is fine with me! I'd prefer to book my own arrangements, quite honestly; after spending so many years booking travel for Kodak, I feel rather skittish about other people booking our travel. I'm too picky (and too much of a control freak) to put our trip in a stranger's hands willingly. So this morning I booked our Beijing hotel, online.